PLEASE NOTE: If you are struggling with infertility or are currently trying to conceive and you DON'T want to read about my pregnancy (which I totally understand), I recommend starting at the beginning of the blog (March 2010) and reading from there. I find out I'm pregnant in June 2011 so there is a lot of trying to conceive posts in between that you might find funny, helpful or relatable. Wishing you all the luck in the world!

Monday, April 26, 2010

Rainy Days and Mondays

It’s raining in New York today and its Monday. This automatically makes me think of the song, “Rainy Days and Mondays” by The Carpenters… for what should be obvious reasons. I admit it – I’m a fan of The Carpenters even though there’s something I find rather depressing about Karen Carpenter. She just sounds so melancholy. Even when she’s singing something upbeat, you can’t help but think, “Man, you sound bummed. Go eat a burger.”

I was sociology minor in college and I remember in one class, we learned that in states where Country Music was prevalent, the rates of suicide were higher. Aside from this being unintentionally funny, I remember wondering to myself what would have happened if Karen Carpenter ever sang country music? It would be a downright blood bath.

Now, let’s see if I can put this correctly: Today is the first day of my second week of my two week wait. Wow. That was like an SAT question, wasn’t it? My initial blood test will be Wednesday so hopefully by Thursday; I’ll know whether or not our IVF was successful. Last week, I managed to distract myself with RuPaul’s Drag Race, coloring books, movies and of course, writing about my experiences, but as I get closer to getting a verdict, it’s so hard to think positively and focus on other things. Plus, the fact that one of the most depressing songs ever, “Rainy Days and Mondays”, is stuck in my head is NOT helping whatsoever.

“Walking around, some kind of lonely clown… Rainy days and Mondays always get me down.”

Bad weather and friendless clowns. Great. That’s a pick me up.

Look - This is not my first time at the rodeo buckaroos. I’ve been in this position several times before… days away from calling my doctor’s office to get test results which have, in the past, always been negative. And here I am again. This time though, I won’t allow myself to get either excited or depressed. It’s not going to help anything and the reality is that as much as it would suck MAJOR donkey balls for this not to work out again, I WILL deal with it. What other choice do I have? Yipee-k-y-jelly!

“No need to talk it out, We know what it's all about, Hanging around, nothing to do but frown, Rainy days and Mondays always get me down…”

Man, this song is KILLING ME…

That’s the thing about working towards having a child, you don’t have a choice in how easy it will be for you, but you do have a choice in how you choose to handle the journey. Typically, I choose to deal with it through laughter, chocolate, the gay channel, and the occasional indulgence of a Golden Girls marathon. That’s my plan people. I’m sticking to it.

One major comfort has definitely been this blog. All of you fabulous readers laughing along with me and understanding exactly where I’m coming from makes me feel less alone. And shockingly there is one lyric in “Rainy Days and Mondays” that does makes me think of all of you:

“Funny but it seems I always wind up here with you, Nice to know somebody loves me, Funny but it seems that it's the only thing to do…”

So I’ll keep writing because any which way, unlike Karen Carpenter, I will survive.

What? Too soon?

If I could JUST have a better song lodged in my head. If I wake up tomorrow, with the theme song from M*A*S*H or Kansas's "Dust in the Wind", I may need to perform a home lobotomy in my Brooklyn kitchen.

Anyone know of a song that’s called “Gorgeous Weather and Tuesdays”?


Anonymous said...

That statistic really is funny. I know what you mean about each day getting closer to the end the more you focus on it. It's hard. I hope that the week flies by for both of us.

Secret Sloper said...

You do know the semi-official song of all IF/TTC-ers (sorry for the acronyms, I know, I know) is Michael Buble's "Haven't Met You Yet." It's peppy! It's jazzy! It's swingin'! Get it stuck in your head already!

I haaaate the last week of the two week wait. I always lose my freaking mind. You seem remarkably sane.

And this weather is the worst. I got home and put my jammies on at 4:30 because I refuse to go back out in this. Lawyer Guy will be walking the pup tonight.

2 Week Sam said...

This is my attempt to put a new song in your head to replace The Carpenters... "Won't you take me to, FUNKY TOWN"

"Oh Mickey you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind, HEY MICKEY"

"Hast Du etwas Zeit für mich
Dann singe ich ein Lied fuer Dich
Von 99 Luftballons"

Nothing. Don't make me come home and sing like Aaron Neville all night.

Nadine @ BDG said...

2 Week Sam-- I'm dying over here--
and 2 week wait-- I had that damned song in my head yesterday as well, and I thought, you know, I actually like both rainy days AND Mondays. Psycho, I know.
I'm going to write a song for sunshine and good news on Thursdays.

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