PLEASE NOTE: If you are struggling with infertility or are currently trying to conceive and you DON'T want to read about my pregnancy (which I totally understand), I recommend starting at the beginning of the blog (March 2010) and reading from there. I find out I'm pregnant in June 2011 so there is a lot of trying to conceive posts in between that you might find funny, helpful or relatable. Wishing you all the luck in the world!

Friday, November 18, 2011

The Story of My Uterus

I recently got a call from one of my nephews. He said, “Daddy told me where babies come out. I don’t think you’re gonna like it.”

November’s ICLW is upon us (http://www.stirrup-queens.com/2011/10/icomleavwe-november-2011/) so I wanted to say hello to any new readers and give you a brief overview of me, my uterus and its scintillating history. Please forgive me if I don’t get too clinical in my descriptions (i.e. medications, doses, dates and details). I’d much prefer to tell you our story as if you and I were sitting having a cup of coffee… so here it goes:

I started trying to get pregnant in February 2009. After several months of romantic interludes slowly becoming more contrived and monotonous, we tried two timed cycles using the drug, Clomid (which in my mind stands by Comical Lady Overly Moody In Distress). Neither of those were successful so we tried three IUI’s (again using Clomid): the first was around Thanksgiving, the second was around Christmas and the last one was on Valentines day (we like our inseminations to be holiday themed apparently). None of them worked.

In April 2010 (which is why I have a picture of the month of April featured on my blog), we did our first IVF using Gonal-F (the F standing for… well… you know). We had eight eggs and three embryos. Not only did it not work, but I found out right afterwards that I had a rather large uterine polyp we lovingly named ‘Jackson Polyp’, that might have been guilty of c*ck blocking our efforts. We’ll never know though for certain.

In July of 2010, we evicted Jackson Polyp and due to lack of funds, waited until January/February 2011 to get accepted into a clinical trial with a different doctor at a new clinic. On this cycle, we used a mystery hormone (how fun is that to inject yourself with some unknown hormonal fluid??? Woo hoo!) that produced ten eggs but only one embryo. Yup. One lone embryo. My husband named it Rudy after the famous underdog who ended up playing for Notre Dame (See the movie RUDY for details). Leave it to a man to make a sports reference out of a fertility disaster.

When the trial failed and we still weren't pregnant, we went to our now third clinic, our third doctor to try IVF for the third time in May 2011. We used our entire savings account to pay for it and all of my medications were donated, so it looked like a potpourri of drugs in my bedroom for awhile: Follistim, Menopur, Progesterone in Oil, Gonal-F, Estrogen Patches and needles galore! I was like an infertile in a hormonal candy store!

Between both the financial strain and the emotional, physical and psychological strain of the past couple of years, my husband and I began to forget that we actually liked each other around this point. We went into our third in vitro never having gotten pregnant once and wondering if perhaps it was time to give up on ever having kids or ever having a date night that didn’t entail talking about my husband’s sperm count or my cervical mucus.

Because the universe likes to try my patience, for our third cycle, we had thirteen eggs but again, somehow only yielded one embryo. Rudy Two - The Sequel! To be clear, one embryo is better than no embryo but when you're infertile... not only do you feel like you need more but you freaking PAID for more. I'm just sayin'.

It was then that my doctor said she suspected that, even though nothing had indicated as such in any of my tests, I had bad eggs. Literally, as I was standing in my hospital gown about to do my transfer for the cycle I was still in, she suggested what she would do differently on the fourth in vitro (How cute is she for thinking we could afford a fourth in vitro??? Simply adorable!)

In June 2011, I had every PMS symptom that I would typically have. The night before my beta, my husband and I made a list of questions we were going to ask the doctor for our “WTF” appointment but as it would turn out, this meeting would never happen.

The next morning, I took a home pregnancy test in preparation to get a negative beta later that day... only to find out that it was positive. As of today, I’m currently 27 weeks pregnant with a little boy and oddly enough, I’m due around the exact date in February that we started trying to get pregnant in the first place.

So, although my nephew is both very wise and thoughtful to warn me, I’m up for the challenge! The thought of labor, delivery, pain in general and pushing something the size of a watermelon out my already exhausted va-jay-jay frightens me but we worked hard for this and I’m just so grateful that we’ve made it this far.

To those of you who are reading my blog for the first time: stop by often, hang out, say hello, share your experiences and please join me as I, a pregnant infertile, slowly make my way to the finish line!

And of course, to those of you who have followed my journey since day one – I can never thank you enough for sticking with me, cheering me on, making me laugh and supporting me throughout all of this. It has meant more to me then I could ever begin to possibly express. And hey -- it IS uter-us... and we're all in it together.

Speaking of which, I’ve been seriously considering starting our own infertility movement called, “OCCUPY MY UTERUS!” C’mon people! Who is with me????

39 comments:

Mandy said...

I loved catching up on all your TTC history and I love even more that it all lead to what feels like a very successful pregnancy! Just so thrilled for you and so glad to have you here and on Twitter :) We are only 17 wks can HOPE to find out gender on the 28th!

-Mandy (@HasAPeanut)

Josey said...

What a cute nephew. Little shit. ;)

Erin said...

I needed this blog this morning. Your writing and humor really brought a smile to my face today. Thanks for that!

sassyNtubeless said...

I'll bring the sharpies and the poster board! let's go!! occupy my uterus!!!! xoxox

missohkay said...

Ahhhhh shit. I am the 1%... of people with Recurrent Pregnancy Loss! Somehow being a millionaire sounds better (?) It was fun to catch up on your reproductive history - thanks for the laughs.

Rebecca said...

You said it correctly that we "paid for more". IF is one hellacious ride that I wish would end for more of us with a baby. I'm happy to note for you it is. Good luck!

SLESE1014 said...

I love the occupy my ute movement...I'm totally in!

Glad to catch up...I think I should go back and look over my TTC history....kind of humbling isn't it?

So glad things are going well!

Amber said...

LOL at your nephew.

kerri said...

wow! what a great 'ending', well almost! congrats on your little boy! third times a charm, looks like!

Elaine VanDRiver said...

OMFG! Love this post! I too found out about a few unwanted polyps...AFTER a fresh and two frozen cycles. Ug. We evicted them too. But, Frannie the Fibroid, who hangs out on the outside of my uterus, she's still around casting big shadows during my follicile ultrasounds--that beotch. But, I am currently PUPO!!!! I too had raging PMS before my first beta, which just doubled in one day, I might add. Just loved your post, I can so relate. And yes, you worked darn hard here. Occupy Uterus!! ;)

zygotta said...

I've been reading you for a while, but not long enough to know the whole story. Thanks for the quick intro ;)

For me the funny thing was - I came in terms with the idea of having problems on the way to getting pregnant, decided to use the time to go back to school and change my career. Enrolled. At the same time, a headhunter found me on linkedin and I started interviewing process, not expecting much (it was too good to be true).

And that's how it happened. I got the dream job. The next day I got the dream BFP. And the next day, of course, decided I won't be changing my career and going back to school...

Hugs - grow baby, grow!!!

Kate said...

I've been visiting your blog for a few months now--I love this blog. It makes my day when I see you've posted something new. I am so happy for you and I have everything crossed (well, except my lower extremties--I AM trying to get pregnant, ya know? Not that it's working...) for you for an easy remainder of your pregnancy. Your little guy will be here before you know it!

Emily said...

Thanks for the background. It was nice learning more about your story. Your nephew is funny!

beren said...

A few thoughts:
1. Nature has a way of making the last trimester increasingly uncomfortable as a way of making the "watermelon out of a hoo-ha" seem more and more like a good idea.

2. They're usually smallish, 2-serving watermelon sized, not 40+ company picnic sized. Unless you're from the former Soviet Block. They birth 'em bug there.

3. They are rarely like Japanese watermelons, so yay - no corners.

4. Your nephew is a freaking riot.

Sending healthy happy feeling wishes your way, chicka. Hang in there. =)

Joys Truly said...

Thanks for posting your story again. Glad I read it and I am so excited for you, your husband and Rudy #2. Love to hear stories of hope, and I love rooting for an underdog. Congratulations!
PS I love your nephew's comment, very intuitive that one!

E and R said...

Love your nephew's comment - too funny!

Slynn said...

Wonderful to hear your story and bring some hope to my ears. So glad for you, and hope my story can turn around sometime too.

Damita said...

Love it :) still so happy you got preggers :)

Detour said...

Hi there! I've been reading you for a while but this is my first time to comment. Congrats on your pregnancy!

bodegabliss said...

Occupy my Uterus! I love it! hahaha.

Auntie A said...

I love your perspective and sense of humor! Congrats on your little babe!

Jenn and Casey said...

Oh! I like the Occupy movement! ;) Been following you a long time, and just so happy that you're 27 weeks PREGNANT!! WAHOO!! Oh, and stopping by from ICLW :)

kmsmitty said...

Jackson Polyp....LOL!!! I'd evict him too... he looks messy.

Congrats on your pregnancy and wishing you the best!

Jes G said...

i love "occupy my uterus". im in!
unless i have to sleep in a tent. i don't really like that.
iclw
xoxo

eggsinarow said...

Occupy My Uterus is so much better than Occupy The Mental Institution, which is where I'm often headed.

Congrats on 27 wks! EEEK!

Happy ICLW.

donordiva.com said...

Jay I am with you! Are you really that far along? Wow, time is flying!!!

Happy ICLW #16

Sam said...

Hey chicky, here as a regular reader/twitter friend and for ICLW as well lol.

Your nephew is hilarious! And very right lol. But I have one happy word: Epidural. lol :)

foxinthehenhouse said...

I am SO on board with the Occupy my Uterus movement. My embies not only need a sense of direction but a healthy dose of political activism. ;-)

acoursetothefinishline said...

Hi from ICLW!

Ok, I just want to say that that email/comment you got regarding your blog was completely uncalled for. That woman was obviously hurting, but that doesn't give her the right to treat you like dirt.
I fear the wrath of my boss when we head into fertility treatments. Another girl in the office is pg and hasn't had an easy time with that. I mean, what are we supposed to do?
Congrats on your pregnancy and kudos on your attitude even when others haven't been so nice.

Her Royal Fabulousness said...

I found on on ICLW and I'm so glad I did. I literally snorted my vitamin water when I read "Occupy Uterus." I'm with you! :)

Congrats on your pregnancy!

theelusivesecondline said...

“Daddy told me where babies come out. I don’t think you’re gonna like it.”

Best quote ever! Too funny!

ICLW #12

Kayla said...

Congratulations on everything!

Regarding your other posts, people will always be jealous bitches. Just ignore it and enjoy what you rightfully deserve!

<3 Kayla
(ICLWer #111)

Krissi said...

This is great! What a great recap! I can use this to feature your story but I would love a bit more. Go to my questions to see what else you can add: http://stressfreeinfertilityblog.com/2010/01/17/calling-all-success-stories/
Thanks so much!

Sarah said...

Happy ICLW!!

I am so happy for you!!! I hope the next 13 weeks fly by and you have your little guy in your arms!!

ICLW #68

Krystal said...

LOL did your nephew really get told how it happens? How old is he?

ICLW #46 Krystal - And already a long time follower
(The Good stuff)

Lynn said...

Congrats on your pregnancy! After all that, I feel you've definitely earned it. Too funny what your nephew said!

As for the Occupy My Uterus movement, I'm with you! What are we protesting? The cost of treatment? The fact insurance doesn't pay for it? Or just the fact it's so darn hard to accomplish?!

Jessica said...

Hi Jay,

1st of all I wanna say congrats and thank you so much for sharing your stories. It helps me so much through my problem getting pregnant. That I was not crazy for getting incredibly jealous over pregnant women.

Amazingly also after our third IVF, we finally pregnant. I guess 3 is our lucky number!

Lanie said...

I know you're a seasoned blogger, but I love your blog so much I gave you an award on my blog. Just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate your humor. I read your posts out loud to my husband. :)

Crazy to be Mommy... said...

I just had my first.. & I really really pray.. Its the lat Embryo transfer yesterday!! IVF is a funny ordeal, makes u doubt.. Whether is all this pain worth the uncertainity & anxiety that next two weeks offers us.
Your blog is a mood lifter :-). Congrats for ur little honey bunny...

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